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Thursday 21 April 2011

TNA Lockdown - ongoing notes

I'm about to sit down and watch TNA Lockdown as I type this. This blog entry will consist of my random, real-time, ongoing thoughts on the show.


Nothing too wrong with the opener, I suppose. I felt they could have ‘made’ someone, and didn’t seem to try, but it was fine for what it was.

I don’t like the multiple pins, but it isn’t like they’ve made any of those guys mean anything. Except Sabin, although you could use a poor performance to be a catalyst to show hat a good team they are.

Bischoff’s interview, at time of watching anyway, was just weird. Crowd chanting “We Want Wrestling.” Was the promo to fill time while something was happening?

Four corner tag. Was it a number one contender deal? If so, they didn’t say it enough. Similar to them in WWE, the commentary utterly ruined it. Taz was an obnoxious prick throughout. Only unlike Cole he wasn’t trying to be.

‘Crimsom’ on the graphic. Typo. Bush league.

Young’s antics ruined the finish. Moore hits the finisher to crickets, because everyone was watching Moore. Much of the match was very sound, and I enjoyed watching it. The finish was a mess. No big deal made about the winners which was a shame. Overall, happiness level is up.

My first instinct with Mickie v Madison is that the curiosity of a hair match is to see someone without hair. It sort of helps if they are a heel. I kind of wanted to see Mickie lose her hair. I guess there is a chance that the rematch sees Mickie demand Madison puts her hair up, and Madison loses. Or maybe Tara gets embroiled and loses hers, which makes her snap at Madison.

Tenay runs through a tale of the tape with a straight face. Tazz: “I got a tale of the tape of my own. Both these chicks are hot.” Ugh. Needless, sexist garbage. Remember that this is supposed to be a replication of a real sport. If a commentator said that they’d get fired. Tazz, Andy Gray on Line One for you, Peter.

He then couldn’t say Sinead O’Connor, and had to ask about the word ‘tiara’. It isn’t becoming of a commentator that he, a supposed expert, is making himself look like an utter fool. Taz probably has enough in the bank with viewers to overcome this, but it’s still unpleasant to listen to.

I’ll assume one of them was injured, I guess. It can’t be a time thing before Bischoff rattled on for five minutes.

Pope’s selling face is ridiculous.

His arse is more ridiculous. Seeing it, anyway. Flair won’t be happy, Pope stealing his gimmick.
I didn’t think Pope v Joe was a classic, but it was really, really nice to watch Joe wrestle (WRESTLE) for more than three minutes. The match fine. Not special, but nothing wrong with it.

Proper booking of a cage match, incidentally. Heel attempts to run, hits sneak attacks for a while. Weeks go by, they are booked where he can’t escape. Face beats the shit out of him. Simple, isn’t it?

Decent enough match with Morgan and Hernandez. I thought Morgan’s comebacks were a little out of the blue at times. Anarchia trying to climb the cage and the door flying open was unintentionally hilarious.
The PPV has run exactly along the line of ‘fine’ thus far. If the main events suck, this will be a bad PPV. If they are great, it will be a thumbs up. No-one will remember the opening hour and a half, but then they are not supposed to.

Kurt and JJ next.

The most heated rivalry, the most personal situation in the history of the business. The first move? A headlock. Major confusion over pinfall/submission on first fall. Bush League.

I’d noticed it earlier but thought perhaps they were waiting for matches they cared about, but even during this, the crowd are DEAD.

Sign: "Earl steals shirts, Jeff steals wives." I can’t believe that (potentially libellous) sign stays in TNA, but WWE removes “Ryder = Ratings”

Tazz was saying “this late in the match-up” at one fall to zero and after nine minutes.

I got a kick out of Angle using a modified (though not well modified) RKO and Tenay saying that he created a new move. Funny.

TNA do not understand cage doors. What’s the point of a lock if the wrestler can just open it?

Holy botches, Batman! What was that supposed to be? A powerbomb? A super huracanrana? Whatever it was, it was the first thing to pop the crowd all night.

Oh man, what is he thinking? I stopped enjoying the match towards the end because I thought Kurt was going to die.

Generally speaking I’ve no real problem with the match in the sense that it popped the crowd and I think the target audience would probably have enjoyed it. But I felt completely uncomfortable with it. Kurt Angle matches just make me nervous now. I’ve stopped enjoying them.

Even without thinking about the moonsault and the botched powerbomb that match was nowhere near as good as Angle v Jarrett from Bound for Glory 2008. 

It’s just occurred to me that Mickie got injured a couple of weeks ago, didn’t she? I don’t mean in storyline, I mean in actuality. That will explain the short match.

The door opened AGAIN in the title match. Come on.........

I liked the double Scorpion Death Lock. Creative and offering something different at a PPV. Nice.
And then double Mic Check. Pretty cool.

I was literally uttering the phrase “I’m enjoying this match. It’s really well laid out” (I don’t know why, because I was alone) when Hogan’s music hit. I didn’t care for the conclusion at all. Hogan still has to be the focus of attention. That shouldn’t have been about him.

I’d even forgive them the shortness of the match because they’d got me into it. But the interference finish felt like they didn’t really know how to book an ending, so they shoved Hogan out there for the hell of it.
The short match length is a little strange given the Sting v Hardy thing, I guess. But again, I’d forgive them that if it wasn’t for the Hogan deal.

Shit, they’re doing Sting v Hogan aren’t they?

I love Matt Hardy’s finisher. The submission one. Seriously, I do. It's great. 

Oh, Ric. Really? Must you? I don’t know which was worse – him very obviously blading on camera, his arse coming out (Told you Pope was stealing the gimmick) or Tazz saying “His pants are ripped up and falling down, drawers are hanging out, he’s bleeding, his ass is out, he’s getting spanked. What the hell is going on here?” Only for Tenay to imbecilely reply “That’s Lockdown”. What the hell does that even mean? At least Tazz said “Is it?” and sounded doubtful. This commentary has been dire tonight. Tenay just sounds like a confused old man who has lost his enthusiasm. 

It’s just sad. Like Tazz said, that’s a Hall of Famer. I’m not blaming TNA. That’s what Ric wants.
Oh look, the door opened again.

Cool spot with them doing the ‘Beer!’ ‘Money!’ thing as the roof closed.

Oh my. I’m getting a little tired of getting worried for people. Was it worth the risk with Daniels, when Hardy backdropped him? He wasn’t a million miles away from coming off that cage.

Ugh. Cane shots to the head. Needless.

Flair looks hideous. And now he went up wrong for a spinebuster. He could have broken his leg there.
Oh, now Daniels has come off the cage, but of his own volition. I’m ok with that bit – he, Abyss and Hardy are pros – but the backdrop spot was too risky.

If you accept the nature of TNA in that AJ can just wander into the cage, that wasn’t a terrible ending. It lessens the point of the cage match, but that had been killed before this show anyway. You could argue that it’s not really selling an injury too, but I’m trying to be positive.

Generally I didn't like that main event, but I accept that it's the kind of match that if you are a big TNA fan you probably really enjoy. So I won't be too down on the concept and some of the execution, because it probably suited the audience. 

When I was at school we did a science project where we had to build a bridge out of string, paper and pasta strong enough that a matchbox car could run over it. Shortly into the project our teacher said he thought ours was the best in the class by miles. We were really chuffed.

But we didn’t leave it. We kept adding to it. And adding to it. Then we added things. And then added to it. In the end, we ruined it. We should have left it be. But we kept tweaking and it ended up being a nightmare. That's a true story. 

That’s TNA. Their basics are fine, and then they overbook, overwrite and you end up with chaos. They don't know when to leave things. 

I thought Taz was awful during that show. Really bad. He took away from match after match and made himself sound like a tool. Get Foley on the headset. Tenay not much better. 

Frankly, that was another TNA show which will please TNA fans and apologists but won’t attract anyone else. So, then, business as usual. It wasn’t a bad PPV, but there was better booking and wrestling at Wrestlemania, which many people said was a piece of garbage.

The last hour or so made me feel ill. If TNA lose a wrestler to a major injury or worse, they can’t say they were not warned.

It was interesting that Hogan and Flair got bigger pops than most babyfaces. No one wants to boo them.

The crowd looked great but sounded terrible. The one in Fayetteville kicked this one’s arse.

I thought the first half of this show was ok, fair, middling. Nothing special but nothing bad. The second half featured more excitement, energy and crowd reaction, but it had plenty of aspects that I hated. 

Friday 1 April 2011

Wrestlemania week: First memories

I guess there is a certain irony that perhaps my favourite Wrestlemania is the arguably the worst in history.

It isn’t because of some kitsch value or because I don’t know what I’m on about (a point you might argue, however) but because it was the first one I remember thinking about for weeks, month on end. It was Wrestlemania 9 (or IX, if you prefer) from Caesar’s Palace, Las Vegas, Nevada. My young brain didn’t know that it wrestling terms it was a pile of old toss, instead I drank in the spectacle and knew I wanted to go to one of these events some day (If you’ve been following the Mania blogs this week, you’ll know I did so, 16 years later, in Houston, Texas. Scroll down and you’ll find I’ve told you all about it)

The first Wrestlemania I ever saw was actually Wrestlemania 8. Wrestling was something other kids at my school were into, and ever since one had leant me a copy of Summerslam ’91 on VHS – yes kids, a video tape – I knew I wanted to watch this bizarre new spectacle I’d been introduced to. However, WWF was only on Sky television, and my house did not have Sky until about February 1992.

Reading my mates’ wrestling magazines, playing wrestling top trumps and pretending to understand conversations was my education in wrestling until that wonderful day in 1992 when our Sky was installed. I kid you not – the very first thing that worked on that satellite system was wrestling. Maybe that was a sign. It was a Sid Justice squash match. I watched Mania a few weeks later, but I was still very much on a learning curve.

By the time Wrestlemania 9 was occurring, I was obsessed. I watched every show I could. WWF Mania Saturday morning, WWF Superstars Saturday night, WWF Wrestling Challenge Sunday mornings. Heaven. I was a huge Bret Hart fan as a kid (still am) and so the whole build for me was about Bret v Yokozuna. The other aspect of the build I remember massively was Tatanka beating Shawn Michaels in a non-title match (The Native American was still unbeaten at this point) on Superstars and the crowd going crazy. I still think much could be learned from the booking of a secondary title on a heel the way Michaels carried that IC belt.

I loved Wrestlemania 9. I now know it sucked, but I was so immersed in the WWF at this point, completely sold on how much I loved Bret Hart, Randy Savage, The Steiner Brothers and Mr Perfect, totally in love with wrestling.

I think I knew it was a work. Obviously I didn’t understand the inner workings of the business (maybe I still don’t!!) at the time, but I can’t ever recall thinking “this is real”. I think the only part of WM9 I hated at the time was the two Doinks nonsense. I loved that Doink character, and never liked Crush for some reason, but hated that finish. I had good taste from an early age.

Actually, no I didn’t, because I remember being intrigued by Giant Gonzales. Stupid boy I was.

Wrestlemania 10 was one of my favourite Manias, and still is to this day. I think it was a decent show, certainly for it’s time, and stands the test of time. HBK v Razor in a ladder match was so ahead of it’s time. And if you watch it is so different from the types of matches that involve ladders these days. It wasn’t a flipping and flopping X-Division style match, it was a TLC/MitB stunt show. It was still a psychological classic, it just happened to use a ladder as a weapon. Some of the bumps Shawn took were crazy.

As a Bret fan, obviously I was intrigued by Bret v Owen. That was one of my favourite feuds of my formative wrestling years. There are a couple of Bret Hart matches which are held in massively high regard that I’m not fond of – specifically versus Owen in the cage at Summerslam and HBK at Mania 12 – but the opening match against his brother was a cracking effort. It made Owen a star.

I’ve always loved watching shows from Madison Square Garden. WWF always did a good job of making it feel special, and I’ve always liked the fact that the aisle faces the hard camera, especially for Royal Rumbles.

Aside from a brief cameo from the likes of Burt Reynolds to ring announce or perform a similar job, the early Manias in my life were Celebrity free. WM11 was the I saw to be heavy on that. From Lawrence Taylor in the main event wrestling Bam Bam Bigelow to Pam Anderson accompanying Diesel to the ring. They don't always get it right with the celeb involvement, but it was one of the things that by this point started to make Mania feel that little bit special. You didn't get Salt and Pepa singing for Survivor Series. 

Tomorrow I'll talk some more about some of my favourite early mania memories.