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Monday, 10 September 2007

I believe Vince's son is..............

So tonight is the night when we find out just who Vinny Mac's l'il boy is. And it ain't Booker T. Sucka.

It seems the man formerly known as GI Bro has gone off in a Huff, man.

Have you noticed that pretty much any wrestling site you go to - news, columns, opinion, funny stuff. No one is telling you who the bastard son is. Sure, we all knew it was originally Mr Kennedy, but most seem to have their mouths and keyboards shut.

So, in order to work it out, I'm going to take you on a whistlestop tour of the roster. Lets start with Raw.

Cena? No point, too big a name. Also wasn't around the ring when Vince said it was a superstar

Jeff Hardy? For the sheer fact that he has nothing else going on, he could be the man. However, this role is going to require a great deal of time with mic in hand or acting with Vince and Trips. Jeff's strong suit is not his promo skills.

Cade & Murdoch? Not big enough names, and in programme with Londrick.

Lashley? Too injured

Brian Kendrick & Paul London? See Cade/Murdoch and flip the names.

Carlito? hmmm. Is facing Triple H this week, and The Game will surely be involved in this angle long term. Carlito is good on the mic, and is of the level that needs to be elevated. However, Carlito's father is legendary grappler Carlos Colon, so you would doubt that would be contested.

Charlie Haas? Nope.

Cody Rhodes? Once again, he is best known for being Dusty's boy. Can't be.

Daivari? A joke foreign heel? Not a prayer. (leave it)

Duggan? Nooooooooooooooooooooo

Lawler? Of course not.

Coach? No, but thankyou for asking, Sir?

King Booker? Hahahahahahahaaha. Sucka.

Mr Kennedy? Absolutely no chance.............................no chance.

Randy Orton? Cowboy Bob and the fact that he wasn't around the ring say no for him. This is a rumour killer.

The Highlanders? Ahh, those modern day Bushwhackers, what happened to them? Anyway, its not them. Vince isn't ginger for a start.

Santino? If he didn't suck in the ring, and his build up wasn't so crap, then this would be more feasible. He is more likely than most mentioned thus far. But still no.

Sandman? I shouldn't have thought so.

Shawn Michaels? Unlikely, although if they have a convaluted script on hand, they might try to use his star power to boost the angle. He doesn't have to wrestle for a bit, and they could play off his chemistry and history with Trips and Vince. Possible, but unlikely.

Shelton Benjamin? I jokingly wrote about an encounter between Vince and Momma Benjamin, but honestly, and I don't mean this in a racist way, he'd be a proper candidate if he wasn't black. I think it being a black man would be too complicated in a genetic manner. Sorry Shelton. In a side note, though, he is due a push again.

Snitsky? No. But if I'm wrong, it isn't my fault.

Super Crazy? ay, ay, ay. No es bueno.

Triple H? The Game is the central antagonist in this whole thing, he cannot be the son. That throws into the question the fact that Triple H married his sister........no. Even the WWE........no.

Umaga? Regal? Nope, suspended and have no chance.

Val Venis? yep, thats it. a 36 year old jobber. (note sarcasm)

So thats Raw.

Now, the thing is, ECW and Smackdown were both taped last night. You'd think that if someone was Vince's son, they would not just go and wrestle on smackdown or ECW, with no explanation. So by that logic, it could well be someone who didn't take part in the ECW or Smackdown tapings last night. So lets take a list of ECW and SD wrestlers who did not take part in the taping.

John Morrison, Marcus Cor Von, Dave Taylor, Chavo Guererro, Hardcore Holly, Edge, Helms, Funaki, Ric Flair.

Morrison, Chavo, and Funaki are absent due to the steroid scandal. Helms and Edge are too, but are injured. Cor Von is a long term absentee because of a personal issue. Holly is injured, Flair as we know is having one or two issues with WWE at the moment. Dave Taylor is not a lot more than a jobber, and has barely been seen since Regal went to Raw.

By the laid out criteria that it can't be anyone from Raw that we've worked out, and that it could be someone who should have been on Smackdown..............then it leaves two men.

Rey Mysterio and Hornswoggle.

Please god tell it can't be Hornswoggle. You can't involve Triple H, Mr Kennedy, the whole McMahon clan, and then have it be Hornswoggle. No way. (I hope)

Rey Mysterio wasn't around the ring, which would stand against him, but I think he has the most chance of anyone else.

He had a major altercation with Vince for seemingly no reason a while back. "Things are looking up" could well be a swerve so that you think its Kane or Khali or something, but its actually the short Mysterio. He was not on Smackdown, and they have changed the SD main event for Unforgiven to include Batista. They could edit Rey right out of that. He is a main event level star that they could use.

One thing against is the fact that he has already been involved in a paternity thing with Eddie, and that might could against.

Anyway, that my guess, I'm going with Rey Mysterio. You (may have) heard it here first.

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